LANSING, MI — What started as a hilarious prank quickly turned into a three-hour ordeal for local resident Kyle Henderson, 28, after he became hopelessly stuck inside a giant traffic cone outside a downtown construction site.
Henderson, who describes himself as “an ideas guy,” had been out with friends on Friday night when he spotted the massive orange cone—a roughly five-foot-tall fiberglass structure designed to block off a lane of roadwork. According to witnesses, Henderson declared, “This is my moment,” before attempting to wear the cone like a hat.
Unfortunately for Henderson, the laws of physics were not on his side.
“The second he pulled it down over his shoulders, we all knew it was over,” said his friend Tyler Grayson. “We tried to pull it off, but he just kept yelling, ‘Ow, my ears!’”
What began as a drunken joke quickly escalated into a logistical nightmare. The cone, which was wide at the base but tapered at the top, had effectively trapped Henderson inside with no way to wiggle out.
“At first, it was funny,” said bystander Megan Lewis. “Then it got funnier. Then we realized we’d have to call 911.”
Paramedics and firefighters arrived within 15 minutes, but extracting Henderson proved difficult. Traditional rescue tools like the Jaws of Life were deemed unnecessary, but multiple attempts to lift the cone off resulted in Henderson yelping, “No, stop! It’s pulling my hair!”
“At one point, we tried to butter him up,” admitted Fire Chief Mike Callahan. “Someone ran to a diner and got a cup of melted butter, but all that did was make him slippery and very uncomfortable.”
For Henderson, the worst part wasn’t being stuck—it was being stuck in public.
“I could hear people taking pictures,” he later admitted. “One guy livestreamed the whole thing and kept asking me to say ‘I’m a traffic cone now.’”
After nearly three hours of effort (and one failed attempt to “scare” Henderson out by pretending to charge him for a construction permit), rescue crews eventually freed him by carefully cutting a vertical slit in the cone and peeling it open.
“We were able to save most of the cone,” Callahan noted, “but honestly, it’s probably going to need therapy.”
Despite his ordeal, Henderson remained in good spirits. “Honestly, no regrets,” he said while still covered in butter. “Well, maybe just one: I wish I’d taken a bathroom break first.”
City officials have since reminded residents not to wear traffic equipment as clothing, while the construction company has reportedly added “Do not enter head-first” signs to their remaining cones.
As for Henderson, he says he’s learned his lesson—sort of.
“Next time, I’m picking a smaller cone.”